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鈥淭he Grace of Perfect Danger鈥�
John 12: 20-36
In our gospel text today, Jesus is having an intimate conversation with a group of people, including some of his closest friends.
And he鈥檚 had a series of really stressful weeks. The other preachers in town are really angry with him.
So as it becomes more and more clear he鈥檚 not likely to live out the week,  can we imagine what his loved one鈥檚 must have felt?
If I were to invite you to picture your closest friend, someone you feel deep love and affection for, what would you be feeling seeing this freight train barreling down the tracks at them? Pure nightmare.
And then we see Jesus over here doing what human beings often do when they鈥檙e about to die.
He begins taking inventory 鈥� of himself, his relationships, his work, his dreams, what he鈥檇 hoped to accomplish in his lifetime, and what鈥檚 going to come to pass when he鈥檚 gone.
And then he turns his attention to his friends (who are going out of their minds with fear for his safety) and he says this:
鈥淯nless a grain of wheat falls to earth and dies, it remains just a single grain. But if it dies, it bears much fruit.鈥�
It鈥檚 as if he鈥檚 saying, 鈥淚 need to die鈥� but what鈥檚 going to be even harder for both of us is this鈥� you need to let me.鈥�
So this is a message about loss and how to face it.
And I really hoped I could get around that somehow, because talking about grief can very personal and very sensitive.
When we lose someone or something we love, and someone approaches us with this sentiment 鈥� 鈥渢hat it鈥檚 for the best鈥� 鈥� how does that usually land? Was that soothing to Jesus鈥� friends and loved ones? Probably not.
But it鈥檚 really great wisdom Jesus offers his loved ones here: some grains of wheat are not given to us for us to hold onto and consume; some grains are given to us to let go of, so they can be planted. It鈥檚 great life wisdom.
I would suggest, though, he says this to them not in an effort to comfort them or help them feel better 鈥� he says this so they won鈥檛 try to stop it.
Sometimes grains in our life 鈥� in ourselves 鈥� need to die. Even those we thought were essential to our life and happiness and well-being.
So if the idea is not to try to stop it 鈥� and not necessarily to feel better about it 鈥� what is the invitation here?
How can we be good friends and love one another well as we practice this letting go鈥� letting die鈥�
One thing we might practice perhaps is instead of avoiding or resisting the process, we might help one another name it 鈥� name what鈥檚 dying鈥� maybe it鈥檚 my sense of control鈥� or safety鈥� or a part of my self-image I鈥檓 really fond of鈥� maybe it鈥檚 a person who made me feel really loved鈥�
And we practice just feeling our feelings 鈥� it鈥檚 an awful practice. I鈥檓 terrible at it.
Okay, what else might we try鈥�?
We might take up the practice of staying by one another鈥檚 side in our hurt so at least we know we鈥檙e not alone in it.
We can practice not shying away or shunning one another when things seem to be falling apart in our lives鈥�
Because have you noticed that when something nonessential in us is dying, it鈥檚 a beautiful process, yes, but it can look on the outside like a full-blown utter disaster.
This letting a grain of wheat fall to the earth and die鈥� it sounds graceful and romantic but it鈥檚 not. For most of us usually it鈥檚 messy and embarrassing and undignified.
And so perhaps we might develop eyes to see when this is what鈥檚 happening 鈥� so we won鈥檛 mistake it for a sign that something鈥檚 gone terribly wrong, when it could be a sign that something鈥檚 gone terribly right.
鈥淢ay you come to know the grace of perfect danger鈥︹�� The poet John O鈥橠onahue penned that horrible blessing. And it strikes me as the perfect prayer for us as we make our way this week with Jesus toward the cross. That we would know the grace that puts all the nonessentials of our life in danger, but ensures that everything truly essential in us is infinitely loved and protected.
 
joined the 91看片网 faculty in 2014 as Assistant Professor of Counselor Education. Gena is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Marriage and Family Therapist trained in systemic and trauma therapies, personality theory, and Relational-Cultural Theory.